FASCINATING AND COMPELLING READING

SKOAL LONG CUT STRAIGHT?:

In about 1980 (give or take a couple years) I worked as a deck hand on a fish tender in Alaska. As such, I had to pull 2 six hour shifts daily in the wheelhouse. The captain did not allow smoking in the wheelhouse. (I smoked at the time.) Therefore, I took up chewing tobacco .... Skoal Long Cut Straight to be exact. So, for the last 30 years, if I have been awake, I have had chew nested up there between the gums and lips ......... that is, until I ran out about a week ago. You see, they don't sell it here. I have seen some cans (2) of other types of chew in Quito at $15 bucks a can ...... holy sh*t Marvin, that is expensive oral cancer. Anyway, I am now cutting up some of my least favorite cigars and making chew out of them. Different, same, different, close and different.

CEDULAS:

As of about a week ago, the Brennie and I have our Cedulas. For those not in the know, this is kind of a national ID that you can get only after you become permanent residents ....... which is something that you can't do until you have helped a lawyer make a number of his/her house, car or vacation home payments. (Our lawyer is building a really nice new house.) For the lawyers, getting permanent residency and Ceduals for the gringos is a major growth industry with unbelievable profit margins. Anyway, having the Cedulas is a good thing.

RIVER BOAT TRIP ON THE AMAZON?

We were thinking of a river boat trip on the Amazon. Then the Brennie did a little reading on all the different parasites etc that are possible there. Maybe a lovely little trip to Bemidji, Minnesota instead.

GIRON OR NOT GIRON, THAT IS THE QUESTION:

I wonder if I will ever succeed in riding my moto to Giron? Giron is a town about 40 km down the road. I have tried to make it there twice on my moto and have failed both times. The first time, I was with my little buddy Randy. We ran out of time because of a some little side trips and a cigar break. So we had to turn around before we got there. I tried again last week sans Randy, cigars and side trips. Instead, I laid the bike down a little past the half way point. In my version of the story, it was not my fault. No big injuries (helmets is good). The bike is ok as I managed to shield it from the road with my body. Some tissue damage (road rash) and bruising. Gawd, it hurt like h - e - double hockey sticks! I am not to old to ride a moto .....maybe a little to old to be laying them down on concrete. The Brennie is not thrilled.

AND FINALLY ......... SOMETIMES I HEAR FROM FORMER STUDENTS:

"I am happy to hear that you successfully fled the United States to South America. Rasdall and I were unable to get details of your crime but we were assured that it had institutionalized several of your former students. Rest well however knowing that the authorities are no longer looking for you, I believe the coast is clear should you ever want to return to the United States." Ryan R

Life is sweet,

Clarke