Saturday, February 12, 2011

GETTING DRIVER'S LICENSE

OKEY DOKEY NOW ..... GETTING MOBILE:


MOTORCYCLE LICENSE:

Randy and I went to get our motorcycle licenses the other day. In order to get one you must:

- Provide a boat load of documentation

- Provide your blood type

- Some other stuff too ..... including $$$$

- But no test has to be taken.


We were told to come back in 15 days because they are out of the paper forms they print the licenses on.



DRIVER’S LICENSE (car)

Brennie and I are looking at getting driver’s licenses. In order to get a license, you must:

- Provide a boat load of documentation

- Take a driving course ....... about $180 each

- Pass the multiple choice test at the end of the course ( it is in spanish)

- Pass another multiple choice test at the motor vehicle place ....... Spanish again.

- Provide your blood type

- And other stuff too



THE WRITTEN TEST:


You can buy a bank of multiple choice questions on the street ........ right outside the govt offices. Theoretically the questions for the real test are taken form the test bank. so, at $1.50, why not. I translated the first 10 questions myself and this is what I got. I am skeptical.


1. When passing on a blind curve:

a) use caution.

b) signal your presence by honking horn.

c) gag any gringos as their screams are annoying.

d) handcuff gringos as it is annoying when they grab hold of things.


2. It is necessary to stop at which one (1) of the following red lights:

a) while making left turn from southbound Unidad Nacional to west bound Tres de Noviembre.

b) Taxi cab with passenger

c) If you are one of the first 4 cars through intersection after light turns red

d) If you are the fifth car at the intersection after light turns red



3. When entering a one way street while driving a car

a) You must always go in the direction indicated

b) You may go in the ‘wrong’ direction; but no more than a block

c) You may go the ‘wrong’ way for up to 3 blocks if you are driving on the sidewalk

d) The one way signs are a gag put up by university art students


4. When entering a one way street while riding a motorcycle

a) The one way signs were originally put up by religious crazies. They all pointed up. They were subsequently changed to point left by godless communists.

b) You may go in the ‘wrong’ direction; but no more than a block

c) You may go the ‘wrong’ way for up to 3 blocks if you are on the sidewalk

d) You must always go in the direction indicated


5. If you hit a pedestrian while driving a car:

a) The pedestrian is liable for all damages to the car

b) The pedestrian has a right of way

c) Honk horn before impact

d) The $40 fine can be paid in 20 equal installments


6. Why should you wash your car within 30 minutes of hitting a pedestrian or bicyclist.

a) It is easier to wash off the blood while it is still wet.

b) Tissue and blood on the bumper attract stray dogs.

c) Tissue and blood start smelling if the car is left in the sun

d) All of the above


7. A rectangular sign on a busy street with ’30 k/hr’ written on it, means:

a) nothing

b) nothing

c) nothing

d) nothing


8. While merging with other traffic in a traffic circle, the right of way goes to

a) the vehicle approaching from the left

b) driver with the biggest vehicle

c) driver with the biggest balls

d) any two of the above will work


9. When approaching or in a snarled traffic jam

a) sound horn

b) sound horn repeatedly

c) all bets are off

d) drive on sidewalk if possible


10. Honking your horn:

a) Cheaper than using brakes

b) Used only in emergency or to warn of danger

c) There is a reason the horn button is in a handy place

d) Horn trumps brakes every time.


See you on the Road.


Life is sweet,

Clarke

9 comments:

  1. Hola Senor Clarke,

    My favorite is #6 on the the Driver's License.

    Hasta pronto

    Senor Lenny

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  2. Hola Lenny ...
    My personal favorite is option a) for #4

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  3. Clarke, you gave me a really good laugh to start off the day!! Thanks, and can't wait to meet you all!! Sue

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  4. Clarke, everyone laughs until they actually have to be out in it and realize you were spot on! Oh you forgot about Making a right hand turn when the pedestrians have a green walk signal.. yeah, we have got to get those gestures down, I don't think the single digit salute is working here.

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  5. Too Funny Clarke!!... But you've got me worried now. I'll be cruising around Ecuador all next month in a rental car, I hope the horn works. Might have to leave the car on the outskirts and take the cabs around town... Mike Wallace

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  6. Hello Thanks for the article. I hear cars are expensive there. How much are motorcycles?

    Thanks, Susan

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  7. Hysterical, Clarke. You truly captured the zeitgeist of the Ecuadorian driving experience.

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  8. is the test really in spanish? I haven't got my driver's license yet. I think I could not answer the exam I could hardly understand spanish. lol

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  9. Very VERY funny. We enjoy your blog. After our Cuenca visit last November, I'm experimenting with sidewalk driving here in Arizona.

    John and Leeann

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