Friday, January 8, 2010

The Happy New Year Posting

OK now, most people know about the miserable record breaking cold and blizzardy stuff going on here in the US, so I will not dwell on or bitch about it. Instead something light hearted, informative, and possibly amusing.

Apparently the Washington Post does a thing every year providing alternate definitions for words that we are already familiar with. So.....some samples:

Carcinoma (n) - a valley in California notable for it's heavy smog.

Abdicate (v) - to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Esplanade (v) - to attempt an explanation while drunk.

Unroll (n) - a breadstick.

Mortar (n) - what tobacco companies add to cigarettes.

Flabbergasted (adj) - appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Balderdash (n) - a rapidly receding hairline.

Innuendo (n) - an Italian suppository.

Semantics (n) - pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood.

Lymph (v) - to walk with a lisp.

Gargoyle (n) - an olive flavored mouthwash.

Instigator (n) - do-it-yourself reptile kit. Just add water.

Now wasn't that fun??

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