Saturday, January 26, 2013

To Blog Or Not To Blog


Hey Kids,

Recently Brennie suggested that I was turning into some type of mean old curmudgeon (yeah, that was a spelling challenge).  What she actually said was that I don't have to be an *sshole ALL the time.

Remember when your mom used to tell you that if you can't say something nice, not to say anything at all?

Well now, that's kind of the reason (actually the exact reason) that I have not blogged recently.

Back to that in a minute.

What I blog about and why I blog……..
I do NOT blog to:
- share social experiences.  (Who we had dinner with, etc)
- give advice or recommendations.  There are far too many experts here.  It seems like the less time a person has spent here, the higher the likelihood that they know everything anyway.
- boost readership because I run ads on my blog.
- sell Cuenca as a destination.

Basically my blog is just my (moronic) observations.
- The longer that I am here …….. the less is new to me ……. the less to comment about.
- Besides, when I started this blog, there were only about 4 others that were (are) based in Cuenca.
- Now there are ……… lots.
- Sometimes I blog just to amuse myself.  Duh.

So…….. back to the whole *sshole thing.

I find myself wanting to comment (make observations) on many of the Gringo Tree requests for info.
Many of the requests are reasonable and legit.
Others, quite frankly, make me wonder about the people submitting them.

Example

Actual Inquiry on Gringo Tree:
"Appropriate Clothing:
My wife will be in Quito and Cuenca 1st two weeks of Feb.  She wants to know if black slacks and coordinating tops/jackets would be better than light tan slacks and lime green slacks with coordinating tops jackets. She will be in seminar in Quito but sightseeing in Cuenca.  She has the evening attire figured out."
(Yeah there are a few grammar boo-boos in that.  I just copied and pasted it.)

My proposed response:
"That's brilliant.  At first I thought, um..... Is this serious?  Now that I realize that it was a spoof, I must congratulate you on your originality.  Well done!

Did anyone actually fall for this stupidity?

OR

Wow, good question!

Most Gringos don't think through the color issues BEFORE crossing the equator.  It is not until after they move down here that they realize that the color wheel seems to shift as you cross the equator.  As many know, this is due to a different refraction of light south of the equator.  Of course the closer to the equator, the more subtle the shift.  For instance, a lime green in Des Moines is close to a hot pink in Lima (further south) but more of a dusty rose or mauve in Cuenca.  The brighter the color, the less predictable (and radical) the shift.  Tans, browns, grays and other neutral colors are pretty safe as the color shifts south of zero are negligible.  Black and white are actually your safest colors.  Plus, they look very fetching with the aforementioned tans, lime greens, mauves, etc. 

Now regarding shoes .......

OR

Have you considered the ever popular safari look?"

OR

Seriously, I don’t think that there is need for you to be concerned about Quito/Cuenca clothes.  Anyone who needs to ask the question, is unlikely to be able to make the flight connections to get down here.  (Notice how I avoided using the word s-t-*-p-*-d.) 

OR

This really depends on how big a gal she is.  If she’s full figured, she might want to re-think the lime green.  

OR

What color tops/jackets is it that coordinates with lime green slacks?

OR

If she goes with the lime green, she can make a political statement at the same time.  We are in the middle of a political race here.  Each party has associated colors and a number.  The colors of Raffael Correa’s political party are lime green and navy blue.  The written part is “35 PAIS”.  There are these signs all over the place. 





I have an idea where the 3 and the 5 could go.


Life is sweet,
Clarke

2 comments:

  1. Clark - I agree with your obviously lovely and extremely long-suffering wife. However, I did have to laugh out loud with this post. I guess maybe the fact that you weren't poking fun at a real person made it less curmudgeonly, I don't know. Anyway, now I don't think you are in as dire need of post-retirement vocational counseling as before. Go ahead, keep amusing yourself. Mara (so far only a Cuenca visitor)

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  2. Hi Clarke,
    Joanie from Minnesota here (better remembered as JoanieBob) Love your blogs. Cranky? Sometimes. Hilarious? Always. This one had me laughing out loud. I am still laughing!
    Hi to Brenda, and please tell her I had lunch with Paula awhile back. We wished B could have joined us.


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